A cat lives in our house. She is brown and called Sub-bass which is is a silly name for a girl cat, or any cat. She is quite nice for a cat but has no manners. She looks cunning when she covers her poo in sand. I am bitter at the cat for making me think crap like this.

This cat likes standing on things and being tall. He is quite elegant and I like his collar. If I had a posh cat that stood up I would call him Lucius and he would like books. He would also live in a dark green study.

This cat is called Rocky though, which is less brilliant and he is watching birds. It seems a good past time for a cat. He is not as good as Keyboard Cat though. I am apathetic about cats but if they make music or watch birds they can be my friend. Maybe I will demand Sub-bass makes a viral for me. I don’t think she has any good skills though.

More info on the cat at boingboing.net who have the latest low-down.