Faris recently Tumbled this image. Interesting, I thought. But I have no radio (and in other news my TV watching stretches to iPlayer, surfthechannel, and 4od, the latter of which I rarely go near out of interface laziness) and wasn’t sure this average quite applied to me*, so I reflected upon my week of insane laziness and drew a picture of what I’ve probably done.

*or perhaps I was just fidgety and had a tablet handy.

I suspect that the book part is in fact fictitious. I’ve been halfway through 2001: A Space Odyssey for three months now, although perhaps this is because I’m more of a Phillip K Dick fan, rather than having a dislike of books (which I do not).

I stole an idea, but we’re sticking with Faris’ notion that that’s okay and it somehow makes me a genius. Bitchbag takes videos and cuts them together in snappy chunks; nice insight to life I think. I liked the idea back in November and also had no video editing skills – a good excuse to master the simplicities of iMovie, if you can call those video editing skills.

Anyway, I got distracted playing around with video from the last half year but finally cobbled together my bits for November and December (which is good because they’ll become massively more irrelevant the minute it hits 2010) . I’ve learnt the pain of removing long chunks of video that I love but no one else would (mostly gig footage), but soon got over it. I quite like them.

Lost my camera charger in December so there’s less chunk-age. Although all that really means is there’s slightly less fit-triggering Christmas lights footage, which I had plenty of anyway.

There’s lots of Alice in Wonderland about recently. I saw the Tim Burton trailer which looks unsuspiciously Tim Burton-like, and also something slightly more interesting was the SyFy (haw) channel’s marching about of white rabbit heads in a New York PR stunt.

I liked this since Alice in Wonderland has nice potential for interpretation and because, in the same way Dr Who sometimes manages, they’ve pulled off the eerie enemy quite well (aside from the slightly awkward dancing, above). Perhaps combine any sort of eye-obscuring object with a suit, and you’re sorted on the evil front (The Matrix for one).

Happily the show ‘Alice’ happens to be up on YouTube, and I like it. It’s silly good fun. Universally appealing, I thought (and really quite interesting after the first five minutes) until the boy looked at it from an uninvolved point of view and pointed out it was girly. For example it’s got romance and a ‘quirky English chap’ type Hatter character who is not only very good but coincidentally fills the “swooning” criteria. So perhaps it is.

Knitting makes me angry sometimes in the way kids get frustrated by not being able to do things. Actually it’s exactly the same.

I suppose it’s one of those things you need to learn from someone showing you but I live in a house full of guys and my Mother is on the end a telephone. So I resorted to the internet.

1. The photo/picture type model does not always work. Even if you do resort to ringing your Mother, pointing her to the online pictures, and using her as an audio guide.

2. Youtube is not always right. You may require three videos. The best way to learn is often to ignore every word said and watch the demonstrator’s hands like a hawk.

After five hours there was progress of twenty stitches. The lovely feeling of getting it right was so good that I didn’t really care I’d been doing the wrong technique for 4 hours and 50 minutes.

I’ve made a beautiful red square and have developed a super-tough knitting finger (one of the sexy aspects).

As with the billboard and TV ads (hedge fund references are lost on me) it’s retro 1960s French chic. The subtitles are a bit of a pest though. I suppose I’m won over by anything that calls itself retro and gets in Florence and the Machine to do a 60s style performance.

Also they have some great poetry:
My Heart,
It aches,
Like my shelf,
Full of sartre.